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December 24, 2010

Don't Judge Me

I know that we are all guilty of judging someone, whether we talk about it or just think it. I know that this is a fact of life, and that it happens ALL OF THE time. It is human nature.
I just think, though, that everyone deserves a chance, I am careful to give that to people. Even if I am thinking that we will never be friends, I am always willing to try....people deserve that.
I recently was not given that chance, and it did offend me.
My friend "Jenny J" and I were meeting for coffee, and old friend of hers "Chello" was joining. We meet, order, sit. the table did not have enough chairs, so I got one from another for "Chello".
We had started a conversation and I included her friend in what I was saying, and then I received a call from my husband. Since he is always one the road, I needed to take it, so I briefly turned from the conversation.
When I had ended the phone call...."Chello" was gone.
Apparently she had somewhere to go, but I was like "who doesnt say goodbye,???"
Jenny J and I continued to sit and enjoy our coffee, chat and people watch. Soon though, Jenny J receievd a text from her friend "Chello", stating, "I don't fit in with YOUR friends".....What the hell does that mean?
I mean, one this girl knows me NOT AT ALL. She did not even formally meet me then before she was out the door, I was polite, I included her in all I was saying and I got her a chair.....SO now why am I being judged??? What did i do???
This is something that I just DO NOT understand.
Should it bother me? Probably not. Is it going to change my life? NO. I just feel like, I was well mannered, polite, and incusive only to be talked about ten minutes later, by someone that I do  not believe should be pointing fingers. And by someone that needs  A LOT of acceptance and understanding in HER life, so should be more cautious of how she approaches and speaks of others.
Like I said, I know that everyone makes judgments and forms opinions....its life and it happens....
But i also believe that everyone deserves a chance...and you have to have an open mind. Everyone is different and sometimes the things you least expect or the things that typically turn you off can become the things you love the most.
Just have caution with your words....
Your ideas and your opinions are YOURS....however, sharing them, makes them open for review and interpretation.
And when your fingers are not so clean, do not point fingers at others.

November 3, 2010

How low can you go????

Its not limbo I am talking about here.......

You know, i love the fact that I make things. I love the fact that I have talented friends as well. Everyone has talent, actually, you just have to search to find what your's is.
Sometimes though, instead of self-discovery, we have people who choose to "steal", "cheat", and get by on the coattails of others!!!!!
Its like that football player in calculus, who is busy chatting up the cheerleaders, but then is the geeks best friend on Test Day.
Makes you wonder; how low can some people go???
When you have a self proclaimed gift or talent, that you choose to devote yourself to, one that you invest hour after hour and day after day. Giving your full attention, and often without much payoff, you still find such joy and excitement knowing you did it to begin with. Fulfillment.
How then, can someone feel "good" about taking that from you???
Of course in life, there will be people with similar talents...similar ideas, this happens. I am not naive to that!!! However, when you see a blatant duplicate, a copied unique style, a repeat of wording...you begin to wonder.

Someone orders the beautiful things you have hand crafted, put your heart into...of course you are full of pride, that someone wants to also enjoy your work....that is until you are slapped in the face with YOUR ideas, YOUR methods, YOUR unique style, ALL OVER THEIR WEBPAGE!!!!!
That my friends is a slap in the face!!!!!!!!!! A BIG ONE!!!!
Of course you are only a crafter, of course legally there is not a leg to stand on....
But, what about morals???
do they even exist anymore?????
how can this person believe they are actually becoming successful, when really they owe all the credit to another????
I support all that want to make things, that want to achieve things....but you have to do that with your own mind, your own hands and from your own heart.
Otherwise, you are staring at nothing more than a thief in the mirror, because when it boils down to it, that is all that these people are.

October 24, 2010

Flying thru the parking lot; A lesson on manners and MORE!

Remember how I promised you all that I had an opinion on EVERYTHING??!??...Well...i was NOT lying....and here comes one with some lessons attached, so read up, learn, agree, pass it on (or disregard....either way....it must be said)

Today, during a quite superb day of roadtripping, girl talk, music, shopping, laughing, crafts, and just plain fun, first my grapevine wreath gets bent to you know where and back and BROKE and we almost get smooshed by this man who feels the need to drive nascar final stretch style thru a parking lot directly in front of where people cross for the businesses. Which in turn sparked my fire, and with that brings you all this blog:

Here we go....
Have we ever heard the elder generations, complaining about how our generation has no manners??? How we are rude, our music is rude, our styles are rude, our mouths are rude, that we are just plain rude??!?
Well, of course you have....its all of the time.
So...do you want to know the truth????
Sure you do....
Its most of these people, these older people, the ones pointing fingers and degrading us and our generation that are RUDE!
I was always raised to have manners.....you say please and thank-you, pardon me or excuse me. You always answer someone with a reply like you are welcome, or No, thank you! It is polite and proper and the right thing to do!!! Manners are learned behaviors, and if this is how they are acting, no wonder "we are rude":
So when i am slowly strolling down the aisle of my FAVORITE craft store in the world...taking my time, with my perfectly picked out wreaths and swags in tow in my cart...and Grandma comes stomping down the aisle, smashes herself into my cart, bends my wreath, breaks the grapevine, and goes UGHHHH, SORRY....WHAT???!!!???? And we are RUDE???
Then....you are coming out of browsing thru a little country store, smiling and giggling and enjoying the nice day....BAM...here comes speed racer, you know, that guy that thinks hes 20 and is really 60, pedal to the metal....blatantly sees you and keeps zooming, like daring you to cross that crosswalk....Yeah...RUDE!!!
Really people...lets grasp this:
If you want someone to be kind to you, YOU MUST BE KIND. If you want someone to say "you're welcome" YOU have to say "THANK YOU". We receive only what we give in life and nothing more....sometimes not even that.
You cannot complain about others, unless you have accounted for your own actions first!!!!
Now I know, that this is something, some people are incapable of, or its just that they DO NOT CARE, however, I am pretty sure the world would be a better place if we just followed these few short rules:
1.) Have RESPECT: and that starts with YOURSELF, and then with others, but do not expect it if you do NOT have it! You do not have to even like someone to respect them, its just a matter of personal choice to be the better person!
2.) SAY PLEASE, THANK YOU and YOU'RE WELCOME: These words go A LONG WAY! They can change your day or someone else's, so always take that into consideration when dealing with ANYONE.
3.) EXCUSE ME: you know, if you want thru, past, around, in front of, to interrupt, SAY EXCUSE ME. You would not believe the positive response or smiles that come from it!!!!
4.) DO to OTHERS and YOU WANT DONE TO YOU: Like i said; you get what you give, sometimes not even that, so GIVE. Freely, without tally and without expectations. You will truly feel good about you....and you have the opportunity to pass that on. When something good happens to us, and we share that with another, they are far more likely to keep it going!!!! Everything you dish out will come back!!! So think before you do, act or speak!!!!

You kill a lot more bees with honey....smile, breathe and be your best you!!!!!!

October 20, 2010

The laws of attraction...or something like that....(really just the laws of MY MOUTH haha!)

So.....where do we start...
My last blog, I shared with you a letter that i had sent to MTV.....because of COURSE i had a MAJOR opinion on Amber...and the lack of intervention that MTV showed....i would first like to go back to that for a few minutes...as something on the Today show this morning, sparked another fire inside of me...(IMAGINE THAT)
** They mentioned this morning how teen pregnancy is being glorified and how Amber has become a star despite her actions and so on and how MTV should have put the cameras down and intervened...how now maybe this is her chance to get real help....
Okay...now Let me tell you WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN DONE and WHAT NEEDS DONE NOW....pay attention, because i am SERIOUS and i promise I AM RIGHT!!!!:
One: I do not believe AT ALL that MTV is "glorifying" teen pregnancy, nor are the tabloids, or anyone else. Teen Pregnancy is a FACT, it HAPPENS, life happens. There are far worse things. I am by no means "condoning" it, nor do I want to have to go thru that with my daughter, however, I am open minded enough, to know, actually allow me to rephrase, I have enough COMMON SENSE to know, that it does happen!! Even to people that we would never imagine it happening to, Sarah Palin's daughter: PRIME EXAMPLE. It is REALITY!!!! We can teach our children, guide them, trust them, love them, offer them alternatives, but truth be told, our children, any child, is a person, a human, they have flaws, they have to learn, they have to grow. And not one is going to do that perfectly without ANY err. Accidents happen, forgetfulness happens, carelessness happens....THINGS HAPPEN. So i will not acknowledge that anyone is glorifying or promoting ANYTHING. It is just another fact of life. And truly, anyone that watches the show, watches the struggles, the turmoil, the drama, the things these children lose, how these teenagers are forced to grow up, lose education and so on....So, if someone finds that to be GLORIFYING, i find that person to be lacking COMMON SENSE. Anyone, after watching that, that would INTENTIONALLY put themselves in the shoes of these teens, is also lacking again, simple common sense. 
Now Two: Amber is NOT a star. And i cannot imagine one person watching that show that believes her to be., There have been many times as i have watched it that I know, I had to change the channel, or flip somewhere else, because she truly and completely disgusts me!!! In so many ways!!!
I do not take child abuse and neglect lightly. As someone who has been hit before, I do not take domestic violence lightly either!!!! 
So, what do I THINK should have happened??!!?
Well, I certainly DO NOT think that MTV should have put the cameras down, I am glad this is on film and I am glad that we saw it, because THIS IS REAL, this happens, and we need to learn how to handle ourselves better and there is no better way then seeing first hand just how ridiculous it  !
Now....Do i think that MTV should have intervened...YES. I think what they should have done was CALL THE POLICE, and FILM this ARREST!!!!! Not just post a website and hotline for domestic violence;  So that it would be perfectly clear what the consequences are when you decide to put your hands on another person in a malicious or harmful manner. That you cannot behave that way, especially in front of a toddler, and carry on as if nothing happened. THAT is what MTV should have done.
i do see that now there are criminal charges pressed and so forth, I did not get to see all of the follow up show last night, but will tonight, but i saw the clips of her alligator tears and how she was "blacked out". Do not be fooled for one uncertain minute that, this is just not exactly what her attorney told her to say, because as she has charges against her now....she surely has to walk on eggshells!!!! I am not convinced and neither should you be!!!! 

Okay....moving on:
Let's talk FACEBOOK!!!
where can i even begin with this. the source of never ending, life changing, DRAMA!!!!!
you want a reality show: START THERE!!!!!!
Now, let me make this very clear first, though i have done this before, i feel the need to once again CLARIFY myself and my page so that we are not confused:
I DO NOT talk about people on facebook. I do not make fun of people on facebook. I do not entertain others drama on Facebook!!!
And i DO NOT like being accused of it, nor do i like being subject to it!!!
Just because you think that you know what i am talking about, does not mean that you do. Just because you read something on my page, 99% chance, it has NOTHING to do with you. There are a lot of people in this world and on facebook and for ONE to believe that so much of my time is spent writing about them, well, seems as though, those would be the people full of guilt or something.
Obviously, somewhere on someones page you are going to see things that maybe hit a nerve or that you do not agree with.....
BUT....life is not about all of us feeling the same way about things, thinking the same things, etc. I myself, could not stand to have thousands of duplicates of myself running around, and I hope that each of you feel the same way.
Now, we all know me...If not, Hi, I am Jess, I have a head its on my shoulders and a MOUTH that i LOVE to use!!!! I am not quiet, or timid with my feelings. My husband will be the very first person to tell you that i am OVERLY opinionated....because you better believe that i have one, about EVERYTHING!!...however, I feel this to be one of my favorite traits....Why???? Well...because, i feel as though its important to ALWAYS be able to stand your ground, to know who you are and what you believe in, to not be afraid that someone may not like it, to not be scared to have YOUR own feelings...to be able to always be yourself, think for yourself and live outside of the box!!! And i can say, that I do that. And i am VERY proud of it!
When i have something to say to someone, I address it with them. I will not publicly humiliate or belittle anyone, as I find those things abusive and disgusting. I am not 12, or in HS and I do not tolerate the pettiness of that behavior, I am not out to impress or sway opinions of ANYONE!
However, I do not need to feel belittled or be cautious of stepping on toes on my own either.
I am a fair person and a good friend. I will always be honest with you....if i say something about you, i PROMISE that i have said it to you....perhaps not in the same words...but i have....and i know plenty that cannot say the same!!!!
Now, staying on subject; I post what I want on my wall, because its MINE, and because i can. you do not have to read it, like it, believe it, look at it...now, if you are going to stalk my comments, my page and my words, and then twist them into something that you have no clue what you are talking about, it is then that we are going to have a problem!!!!
Because one....if i was not talking to you, you have NO right to assume i was talking about you (as reasoned above) and also because, we know what happens to those that assume.
I will not acknowledge, cater to, or attend a pity party, for someone that constantly pulls the victim card and really has no basis to do so, but can be so manipulative with words that we surely all believe it from time to time!
This is the last that i am going to revisit this subject, as i feel as though, i am having to defend myself and my thoughts, yet for a reason that i do not know....
So lets end it like this:
1.) Its FACEBOOK; JUST facebook...its not anything more than status's, words on a computer screen.
2.) I am me....I like me, I am allowed to be me, I have worked hard to be me, and i will ALWAYS be ME!
3.) I do NOT do drama! Its petty. Its childish. Its unattractive. And i will personally excuse myself from it.
4.) Personal matters are handled personally. If i haven't mentioned it to you, it has NOTHING to do with you.
5.) People are RUDE, thats life. It happens. But, do not accuse when you assume!
6.) I am an ADULT. And i will continue to act like one! I have class, and self respect!
7.) I AM HONEST!!!!!!! Period end. HONEST!!!!!
8.) I would truly prefer to not re-discuss this, at least for awhile!!!
Now, you all know my thoughts on teen mom, on amber, on MTV. You know me, who I am, how i feel, what i think. You know where I am coming from. You know that personal matters will remain as that, and anything else, is just an opinion in passing and one which we are all entitled too. And i would certainly hope you all have your own as well!!! Differences make the world the beautiful place it is. 

Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.

Blessings, Love and Laughter:

That girl with the big mouth (i promise my heart matches it tho)

September 29, 2010

Dear MTV and Fans:

I am happy that MTV used last nights episode to display information for domesticviolence, because i am sure out there, there are MANY people that can use that.What i do not understand is how they are not obligated to report this behavior ofAmber;s to the authorities. A hospital is REQUIRED to inform local and civilentities when abuse occurs, so when its happening on National television why isnothing done? Instead it is bascially rewarded with a continued successfultelevision show. I fully believe that Gary is and can be a able and terrific parentbecause this has been diplayed in times apart from Amber. HOwever, when Leahis with her or them together, quite often that child is ignored, neglected andsubject to things that NO child ever should be. 9 years ago I was a teen mom, andi know and fully understand the financial, emotional and even the struggles ofabuse. But i chose to mae my life different, to never allow my daughter to betarnished with negativity and to make a life for her that she could be proud of.Clearly what happened last night was not just domestic violence, but assault,which is a CRIME and i feel as though there needs to be repercussions for thatbehavior. Amber on this after show says she needs help to get better, but all helpstarts with the willingness to HELP YOURSELF, otherwise no program in the worldis going to be effective for you! I understand and sympathize with the struggles ofher everyday life, the things that she has missed out on and the ones she willcontinue to go thru..However, that child did not ask to be born. And since she isdisplayed so much of the time as a burden to Amber, i believe Gary, whether helove Amber or not needs to PERMANENTLY remove that child from the situationor both as adults need to decide to give that child to a couple capable of her careand love. I do not discredit the fact that somewhere deep that Amber loves thischild, I am sure that she does...but that does not make her able to mother, toparent, to teach and to learn. Someone has to be the voice in the situation,because really teens are going to get the wrong message that these behaviorsare ok, and acceptable and often rewarded.